Progress? Moi? No!

Good Afternoon and welcome to Wife Mother Disaster Area of the working class variety. 

I realise that in fact I don't appear to be working class in that I'm not working. Well I am actually, I'm still on maternity leave which finishes in only 8 weeks! *bawls eyes out uncontrollably* And in that time oh my do I have a lot to do. 

     Decided not to plant anything more on the allotment. Everything that we are growing is flourishing which is brill, but we need to research and plan for the spring. This year was always going to be a learning curve as far as that went, but with a new baby on the boob and a full time working husband we've not been able to manage it as well as we'd hoped. Need to research a LOT on the best way to plant things. I've fished out an old subject book which I'm going to fill with plans and advice for plot maintenance. So this years plan, continue with what is growing and clear, fertilise and maintain the rest until Spring hits. Then the baby will be weaned, the eldest will be in school, I shall still have all day to faff and potter. Excellent.

     On the clear out the crap front, as usual I have made absolutely no progress what so ever which is why I am the disaster area I claim to be. If anything I've just made it all worse. I've done a lot of shifting all the crap from one room to another, does that count? Yes, that totally counts, I'm having that! 

     Having said that, the front room is a little better, I have actually hoovered my bedroom and my kitchen and living room are kept clean obviously as I have to with a baby and a 4 year old but the bathroom at it's worst. It's still not decorated (5 years now!)  and it is more of a waste bin than ever before, now filled with bin bags of clothes that either do not fit, are completely threadbare or un-seasonal, all to got to charity shops and clothes bins etc. It's a veritable playgound of adventure for my girl who insists on dive bombing on the piles before every bath time!

If only tidying my own disaster zone was as easy as
sorting out my daughters!

     I really must make an effort to sort this house out! It won't be long before I have to move the baby into his own room, (another room completely filled to the ceiling with junk!)  I left little woman in with us until she was one and that was only because we hadn't cleared/ decorated her room either. Honestly, we clearly need rockets up our bums before we even attempt to get things done.
   Anyone else like me? Any tips of motivation? Any tips on where to begin as far as 'total clear out' operations go? I think I need help, clearance therapy or something. Is there a crystal/herbal tea/magic spell to cure this sort of thing? If there is let me know, I am open to all avenues.

    Must get organised!

Thrill Seekers!

   Hullo there reader! After doing a spot of cleaning the other morning -nothing major just pots, ironing, squirted a bit of polish so it smelled like I'd done some- I decided to phone sister number three of the first batch to see if she and the kids wanted to meet me and my brood for a wee wander. The answer was positive and the plan was to walk and meet up half way. We stuck to the plan and did indeed walk and meet halfway, the halfway line being The Dock Museum of Barrow in Furness, Cumbria. 

    We said our Hello's, and complained about the heat as we trundled along Channelside walk. We admired the lavender which smelt lovely, as we approached Jubilee Bridge. All very tame and normal until.... there came the simply WILD behavior.

  Well my family are obviously adrenaline junkies. We have clearly set a new bar on devil-may-care activities. What did we do? Be patient and I shall tell you. Bungee jump? No. Sky dive? No. Waiting on Jubilee Bridge for a bus to come and make it jolt? Abso-bloody-lutely!!! We take it to a new level of thrill seeking. I should have been more careful of course, involving my offspring, sibling and niece and nephew-ing, in such a reckless activity but hey, I've used it before and I'll use it again, that's just how I roll. 

Oh Look! I actually do bake bread.
Just absolutely not first thing in the morning.

   Nothing else of great importance has been happening over the past couple of days, just the normal day to day malarkey. You know the sort of stuff, waking up get the kids fed, washed, dressed. Put a wash load on, peg the wet stuff out, make pack ups, bake fresh bread and cakes etc. Hahaha! I'm obviously lying through my teeth here, I think we can all safely say that I'm a bare minimum kind of woman. And talking of teeth, I'm lucky if mine get scrubbed before 9:10 a.m! If they don't, I just have to make sure I don't smile or chat on the school run. (Cue thoughts of "ignorant, sour faced cow.") I then have to make time for chin wagging on the pick up,  (cue thoughts of "weird, schizophrenic cow") to catch up on the parent gossip. I have to say though, I've never been to school in my pj's, I mean, you've got to set some standards for the children haven't you haha!

   That my friends is about all I have to share at the moment. I'm off on the hunt for some other Mum and craft blogs.

   Toodleoo!

    

Clear Out the Crap!

The computer and General Crap

Hello there! Sort of following on from my last post, I've decided to make some big changes to help get things moving along. For starters, clear out the front room. Heavens above! It is a mess and I'm not just talking about a few toys on the floor. I'm talking about toys, play dough, guitars, and general crap ALL OVER the whole room. I would take a before shot of the room but frankly, I'm actually embarrassed, so the before shot is out. I have however stretched to some 'after the before, but before the after' shot's, which still might be pushing health and safety and Environmental Health rules of some kind. 

Some Guitars and General Crap

And now I've got the 'I'm a slovenly minger' point across, lets move on to the plan.

As I was saying, when the front room is cleared of garbage, I should like to turn it into an office come library come crafty area sort of thing. A sort of room of concentration, creativity and business. I'm very exited about it. Once I have at least one room of the house cleared and functional I can then begin formulating a plan for the rest of the house. Mostly one big plan. Ie, Rid the house of shite! But lots of mini (clean the sofa.) and maxi (Career change.) plans will also come to pass hopefully. 

Unfortunately everything that I can plan for has to not involve funds of any kind at all. Me and my little family are completely skint. We have a lot of love under this roof but zero cash. And that takes me stupendously onto my next point. Selling crap.

A BIT OF CLEAR FLOOR!
And Some General Crap.

Anything and everything that I do not need, wear, use etc. Shall be sold or given to charity, depending on the quality of the items or whether or not I can be bothered packing and posting. May as well try to earn a few bob, you know, what with the whole skint thing I mentioned before. I may well earn enough for a new craft table. Oooo that would be nice. Stop daydreaming KYLA! 

Maybe this is it. Maybe it's taken me until my 30th (nearly 31st) year to gain a bit of ambition and motivation! Maybe I might not be such a disaster area after all. Although taking a look around my front room, I may already have bitten off more than I can chew. And I'm a porker, I can chew a lot! 

Wish me luck!

Bloody Housework!

   Honestly I know not where to begin. My house is and looks like it shall ever remain... a shit hole. Pardon my colorful language choice but blimey. Kids in the house means a constant flow of toys, games, craft materials etc. all over the floor. I have to admit, I'm a big contributor to this constant flow, but that's OK in my eyes. Because I'm the one who has to clean and tidy, I definitely get to make mess. It's only fair.

   Please see exhibit A rather delightful example of what my beautiful daughter leaves for me after a play session. This, and I quote "Mummy, I like making a mess!" Really? I had absolutely NO idea. Don't get me wrong, I'm actually the kind of person who laughs at this sort of thing. As long as no little pieces go missing, (Note, all boxes are still lidded.) then I am fine. We all have a giggle, tidy up then wait for another tornado to hit tomorrow. Fortunately my husband is also of this temperament, so that saves a whole lot of family aggro.

Exhibit A 

   One particular thing that my husband does that winds me up, has to do with the bath. He NEVER rinses the bath around. I don't know why it irks me so much but it really does. Still, if that's all I've got to whinge about then well, I really shouldn't be whinging should I? 

   I really do need to get back on track with the housework. Since having the wee lad I've been slacking. I can't even blame it on the baby because 98% of the time he's brilliant. I need to formulate a plan of action. A chart perhaps of what needs doing and when etc. Or I should stop writing list's and compiling charts about cleaning and actually pick up a flippin' duster! That way, something might actually get cleaned. NO, I don't think so.

   It's My daughter's sports day tomorrow, one thing I absolutely hated when I was at school even when I was really young. I was very aware that I was utterly crap at all sports available on sports day and I've come to terms with it. I mean, I'm 4 foot 11.75 inches tall,  pear shaped, with zero tolerance for competitive streaks. So anything more energetic than tiddly winks, is completely off the table. 

   I digress. This bit's about my daughter and there I go whinging on again.

   I really can't wait to see her  play. She's told me she'll be running really fast and she going to win! (Well she doesn't get that from me!) Good God! I hope they don't make me do the egg and spoon race again!

  

 Well, as I appear to be nodding off at the computer desk, I'm thinking I should probably sign off. So cheerio one and all and take it easy!